The younger stars(girls) aged between 19-22, are the first generation most probably in Kenya to have all then fan in the world without feeling guilty at all. They can binge drink, finish all the drugs from the supplier, have coitus, polyamorous coitus, exchange partners with ease and they won’t feel an ounce of guilt.
Older women often have fun, can do much what young women do, but there is always some lingering doubt, shame and guilt. Perhaps because of religion. Societal judgement or perhaps of what their mothers` taught them.
But the world has changed a lot. We are living in a neo-post-post-modern world. Any time I hang out with female friends, I literally realise I am a dinosaur. A tall, perhaps, unthinking dinosaur. A 20-year-old, my age mate, cannot believe the lengths women went to own their sexuality in the past. My elder female cousins could be skinned alive if their fathers even dreamt they were dating even in collage.
Women were raised to preserve their value for marriage. And a lot of judgement, punishment, criticism, was the norm to ensure they did. There were days in Social Studies classes girls were meant to sing the dangers of unwanted pregnancies. In fact, so Many women in the 80s and 90s were meant to marry the men who impregnated them if they were to stay alive. Ever heard the joke that if you are a first born you made your mothers marry a man she would never have otherwise married.
Silas Nyachwani opines in one of his articles and I quote, "Nowadays, life and marriage has become like University. Nobody sees the value of University. It’s not a matter of life and death. Same with marriage, most of ill-mannered kids grew up in broken homes. And there are increasingly fewer “picture-perfect” marriages to aspire towards. This, there is no reason to preserve their value. In fact more and more mothers are encouraging their daughters not to be tapped into marriages. They are telling their daughters, go out and have fun."
Have fun in the world without ability to feel guilty is a wild and beautiful thing when you think about it. Hedonism is only worth it when you don’t have feelings of guilty attached to fun. While it’s a beautiful thing, there is a downside to it. When we live freely, from drugs to clubbing and all, we expend ourselves faster. Brian Osano often tells me, men who live such life, risk a nihilistic life in the end. Like you will hit 30 and you will have had all the fun in the world, life will literally have nothing to offer.
In life, we are all given batteries to last us the life expectancy.
In the meantime, let the girls enjoy. Let them have all the fun. And since they seem to be copying us, men, I request them to go one step better. Also, face the consequences of their choices. As the world is getting pulverized by capitalism, there will be no one to blame for the outcomes of their lives later in life.10 years from now, one cannot or should not say, “I was young and dumb.” Because increasingly, the world (men will not own problems they didn’t create.) This is a very uncomfortable truth that we will have to face. One way or another!
dravilduke88@gmail.com
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