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Lessons Learned from Finishing Campus

“The next time you live like this will be when you’ve made your first million,” the old tuk tuk driver transporting my belongings from college to my new home remarked.   “Out here, you don’t vandalize property because your tap is dry or there’s a power outage.” His tone carried a hint of sadistic sarcasm, regardless of how well-meaning his unrequested guidance was.   In the past few months, I’ve been having numerous meetings with Mr. Reality. Just two weeks ago, while attending a graduation party at a friend's place, the caretaker stormed in, furious, and served a notice that completely killed the party. Only recently, while shopping at a local supermarket, I found out that the price of Unga has skyrocketed to six times what it was when I started my college four years ago. These are just a few of the harsh realities that the seemingly comfortable life in college shelters you from. It's not amusing at all.   Reality is the most grotesque monster one can face, parti...

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Once again, Main Campus received averagely attractive chicks, all of whom appeared to be planning to join the countless church groups, MU band, Aisec, Red Cross, and those pretentious societies that make them chicks so painfully principled. 

I spent the better part of last week(Tuesday) trying to notice a beau, a sight of sore eyes, but I didn't see anything stunningly beautiful. Sometime during the day, a short Ka Chick showed up. Wasn't she a juicy piece of meat? (no offense nor pun intended.) That ass was the roundest I'd seen in a long time, albeit it couldn't compete with the ass of a certain second-year who has an ass with a mind of its own. Let us discuss her. 

It's unlike anything I've ever seen. Her buttocks appear to be having healing powers. Every man at this university who has seen it agrees that they don't get any rounder, shapelier, sexier, or more attractive than that. If you are walking behind her at 6.55 a.m. for a class of 7, and she is strolling, you will be late. They are stable and secure. She is tall, with the grace and swagger of a Peahen or a Peacock.

 And man, she dresses it well. She has hot pants, tights, and skirts that are specially designed. She is cognizant that she has an ass and is certain of it. She does, however, date the most unlikely character. The foundation of their relationship has evaded me and a million other males who live on campus. Either the male is well-hung or they are members of a cult. However, to this, we shall return in the subsequent blogs. 

So, reverting to freshas, and notably the comparable Ka fresha chick. She has rings all over her face, nose, ears tongue, apparently on her navel, and you know where else. She was beguiling, and her demeanor was equally so. 

Hopefully, she has not carried her boyfriend onto campus, and I hope She isn't just another gold digger who will be dining, clubbing, and drinking with broke-assed males who comprise the many men on campus. I am definitely on the list of those who will sell lies to have her attention. I am hoping to be the best man who wins. 

The rest of freshas were unimpressive, but I'd want to use this opportunity to debut my fresha blog series. 

 So check back here, every day, weekly  for updates, including rumors of freshas (read fresha girls) doing a hit-and-run. I thought this was a man's job … 

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