 |
| Photo Credit , Freepik |
It is an explanation I was bound to give to the few readers of this blog
My friend Kelvin, with whom I shared office space last year, suggested that I start a blog.
"It's free, and you'll be in charge." Kelvin, the extroverted nerd who also served as my IT assistant, informed me. I never really gave it much thought. I was so consumed with the absurd burden of being a data entry specialist at Cloud Factory here in town (Imagine reporting to HR every weekend) that I considered giving up writing entirely. It was not going to pay my bills, so I had to find another job. Data Entry? There was some quick money there, but I despise lotteries and fast money.
I was not getting enough publicity for my fledgling writing profession at the time. I'd had a dozen stories about men, women, and relationships published in The Legacy, Third Eye. Friends continued asking me what had happened to columns, and it was disheartening to inform them that the opportunities were dwindling by the day.
Twice, I have considered deleting this blog, once when my laptop was stolen with all my projects, and two, I was so low that I lacked the motivation to pen something when I met Uncle Nyanchwani at the Story Moja Hay festival and we had a brief father-son conversation during which he told me, "Writing is hard, but you don't have to quit up when it gets difficult." You continue to write every day. It's like exercise, and the more you do it, the better you get, Ni kama tizi!" I took his word for it and convinced myself that this is what I am greatest at.
Late last year, I began blogging via wordpress.com, naming my blog Random Thoughts, and began posting previously unpublished articles while also writing new ones. I wanted to be current on subjects. However, I noticed that I was limiting myself and that wordress.com was really tough to navigate and obtain data from. Then Kelvin saved the day once more by recommending blogger.com.
In September 2021, I formally moved to Blogger and created an eponymous autobiographical blog. I wanted to record my experiences on campus. I played a struggling male student who is unloved and attempting to fit in with the fast-paced, crazy university culture. I was supposed to use self-deprecating humour in the blog. As long as there is no malice involved, I enjoy it when someone makes fun of me. I don't mind being told that my head looks like an onion or that I'm as slender as a beanstalk.
I was supposed to chronicle the daily challenges of the average college guy and woman. Over time, I gained friends, mostly from Facebook, who would show up on a weekly basis for regular hijinks from me and my university pals.
I started with 50 or 70 readers. It improved by 60 and hit 110 to 130. Then 180. Then I got to 200. That was as good as it could go given the size of my Whatsapp friend list. The blog felt like an inside joke. It was a familial affair, where only those who knew me could understand the context of the incidents.
Whenever a blog clicked the 200th read, it was already a success for me. At 130, that was satisfactory. Below 100, I had to take it on the chin and write something interesting the following week. I noticed that content about women and sex received the most clicks, whereas cerebral content received the fewest. More essential, I discovered how to balance.
This blog is amazing. So much to say. I write it spontaneously. It works as my gym. I simply set out time during the week to punch the keyboard whenever I come across a computer, whether it's in the office, in the cyber, on my laptop, or anything else that can type, even a phone. It's always a liberating feeling since I'm constantly speaking from the heart and being completely honest. I think about it all week and keep an eye out for anything worth blogging about. If I've had a horrible or slow week, I'll choose a topical issue.
But, if there is a specific incident, especially one involving liquor or "relationships," I always try to recreate it. My goal is usually to make someone laugh about the absurdities in my life and have them nod along if they have comparable absurdities. I have a group of friends with whom I run the ideas to confirm them and even acquire an anecdote to 'spice' up the story.
I have enormous aspirations for this platform, and I hope to unveil an alternative media, all-inclusive, less sexist, or at the very least presents all the varied views for guys aged 20 in the next months. Keep an eye on this.
I'm applauding my readers!!!
While I average 150 reads and ten comments every blog, one thing I've learned is that there are folks that sneak onto the site and then disappear. Some people will text. Some will message me on my email or inbox me, but the majority will keep it to themselves and ask when we can meet. 30% will have trouble logging in and leaving a comment. Another 30% will be too busy. Another 30% will be overburdened. And the remainder will read all I say and discard it or simply ignore it, believing that if they say anything, especially when I write dirty, they will be associated with my usually dirty thought. But friends have kept the blog going, and here are my top 10 readers.
1.Jack
The statistics show that a campus classmate and buddy from Pokot, is the most constant reader and commentator on the blog. Jack appreciates the ease with which I deliver the facts.
Jack, we need to toast as quickly as possible; you can tell me whatever whisky you choose (And I mean it). For your friendship, readership, and for keeping me on my toes while I took so long to write the words. Simply holler! If you're a teetotaler, that's too bad; straight men don't buy each other lunch...But your readership is greatly appreciated; keep it coming, and let us all grow together.
2.Regan Mireri
The Luos are renowned for their brilliant intellect, outspokenness, and rapid political thinking. Regan has all of these qualities and more. He has a very eccentric mind that keenly studies everything before delivering something exceptionally insightful into the backdrop of the dispute.
Regan once urged me not to be angry when we were laughing at a woman who had cheated on me... "A man is not irritated by sharing a restroom with his in-law" (Toilet by no means does not allude to the woman, but rather the context).
Regan contributes intellectual commentary to the blog and is never afraid to call out a mistake, an oversight, or when I make a complete fool of me. He is an outspoken speaker, and if you see an intellectual concept or statement that is not attributed to anyone, odds are it came from Paul.
Some Gilbeys are on the way, Baba. Get yourself some lime and let's continue doing this.
3.Brian Osano
I've traveled a long distance with this woman's son. He was my first friend on campus. I recall him inviting me to his mental health group, while I was a week old on campus, we kicked off a long friendship full of brilliant and stupid moments, but primarily silly.
Whenever there has been a competition between me and him over a lady, I have always lost. He has an unexplainable magnetic attraction to women. I loathe him for it. I mean, why do women always make bad decisions? For example, why would a lovely woman prefer Manchester United or desert me in favor of Brian?
In any case, Brian is the source of many tasty and amusing anecdotes in this blog. If you read something really amusing, it most likely came from Brian. We have humorous anecdotes that we willingly share with friends to make them laugh. Let us do it again this year, Brian. F2 Tunaenda For the sake of old times, it's Friday, baba.
4.Joel
This tremendously talented terrific friend, two years my senior, is another credited blog reader. He frequently believes that my thoughts are unorthodox and that my relationship theories are untested. He frequently expresses his mind and believes that, even when I am acting like a sheep, I make for intriguing reading.
5.Nedda
My darling sister is among those who read and comment on a regular basis. Sometimes I write pretty awful things that I wouldn't want my mother to see, but she just skips over them. Ezinah is the fuel for my writing. Thank you, Sizy, for believing in me.
6.Jason
This distant relative traveled all the way from Texas to Kenya in 2018. I was girl-shy at the time, and he once mocked me for being unable to confront a girl I had feelings for. He continues warning me that when he returns, he would take all of my girlfriends because he is simply irresistible. He usually tweets me to request a fresh post and believes that the blogs make sense despite me.
7.Wanyama
Poet and philosopher. Thanks, man, for keeping it here. Man, I am moving a motion to create a parliament for artists.
8.Comfort
She is a recent reader to my blog, yet he is one of my most devoted readers. Continue reading, Ma'am. Keep going.
9.Agnes Kilonzi
I occasionally need a nasty female friend to whom I can turn and chat dirty. I don't mean naughty in the sexual sense, but rather someone who can talk foul and look me in the eyes, or who can tell my male friends loudly that they are ass****. Aggy is the only one.
I have no idea who she is now dating. We just get together for coffee once in a while (boy, this chick can soak up the coffee.) That's all there is to it. But, in my opinion, she usually shakes her bum in a cotton white towel once from the shower to the boyfriend in the morning, somewhat cheekily, before telling him, "... You are not having any moaning glory... You'd better get up, honey, or you'll be late for work." Agnes, you're a bully.
There's nothing like a sexist joke, male or female, to brighten my day. Agnes, despite her recent absence, has that enticing, shining charisma that is all too admirable. I made the biggest blunder of the last decade by allowing what we had to drift into a friendship zone, and instead of creating the best of lovers, we ended up being the best platonic friends on the planet.
10.Caroline Muikia
Our relationship never ended because she thought I was what I wrote and she evaluated me harshly based on my writing. She came to the conclusion that I was a player, a woman-hating chauvinist with little respect for relationships. She periodically asks me how I'm doing in WhatsApp chat. She believes I have problems. What could be more false than that? But, Caro, keep reading, that crush is still there, and please don't shatter my heart by bringing images of your boyfriend...
*******
Special gratitude to Nyeri"s finest Mitche (Michelle??)for being a big fan, even when I write stuff that gets under the skin.
Nakuru's finest Monicah of course in good muse and vibes and the queen of grace if ever there was one. When in doubt I turn to her and tells me to carry on.
And last to Tom Bosich, my big brother who got me into this game (Seeing his byline Thomas Bosire)made me believe that a boy from Kisii hills can take up a pen. He is an incredibly intelligent and gifted writer.
******
Per the stats, these are the top readers. I know there are individuals who are more enthusiastic, but this is all we offer for beginners.
PS
Best wishes for the coming year. Let's try it again. We shall get bigger, better, and wiser. Maintain it here.
Merry Christmas t o you all. Will be home with Lilian (my mother). Currently she is the woman of my heart and soul. Which means you will not hear from me a while. But before I sign off, along side your comment (if any), why don't you drop your mother's name (both) and say what you love most about here? Then wish her a merry Christmas. If she is late, say what you miss a lot about her, sawa? Let's celebrate our mothers. Wababa (or is it akina baba? I think ni akina baba wangoje kidogo) wangoje kidogo!
Then someone say a short prayer before we leave ...
.jpg)
Comments